What do you get when you fall in love? We know it’s a lot more than “lies and tears and sorrow…” or people wouldn’t keep looking for it, and living for it. But the fact is, love changes, from the first wild ride to a pace that can last your whole life if you work at it.
Researchers at the University of Chicago did a study of people who were “in love” and found that hormone, adrenaline and sensory levels were higher than those of individuals who professed not to be in the grip of passion. This isn’t a very surprising conclusion–except that the love that they were measuring was passion for a job or cause, not a person.
Think about when you started your job, after weeks or even months of pursuit, then the thrill of being chosen. Everything’s fresh, everyone really listens to you, and the possibilities seem limitless.
But as time goes on, the adrenaline fades and it gets harder to overlook the little things that bother you and the big things you thought you could change but haven’t. That’s when obstacles seem insurmountable, and it’s easy to feel unappreciated, undervalued, and unloved.
Is it time to check out want ads, or is there some way to get it all back again at your current job? Just like in any long-term relationship, you have to work at it–not just the job but the way you feel about your job. If the passion is fading, try a few simple things:
Even in our casual dress culture, take a little extra time to show your pride by looking good at the office. You’ll feel in control and powerful, and a lot less likely hidden behind a computer screen.
Get involved in company activities, from quality improvement committees to baseball teams. You’ll begin to see others differently, and they’ll get a fresh look at you as well.
Meetings are still a great way to stay in the loop and add your energy to the future of the company. If you find that you are relying exclusively on dropping emails to colleagues instead of speaking to them, step away from the computer and get some face time.
If you feel undervalued or want new challenges, let your boss know what you need. Do what it takes to get invested and involved and you might just find yourself in love–all over again.
VP & Senior Relationship Services Officer
Intermountain Community Bank